Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Good morning, I'm Hannah. For anyone who hasn't met me, I am one of those youths that was saved. For me, it was during university. Big shout out. Anyone here who's part of Numa?
[00:00:13] Yeah, it's a couple. Yeah, I got saved during Numa when I was 19. That's now 15 years ago. I don't know where the time goes, but there we go.
[00:00:22] I am a secondary school teacher and most importantly, I'm married to the wonderful tendi who was leading worship. And we had our little boy banaya last September, who is our treasure. And it's really funny, isn't it, how you can prepare for every eventuality and yet the thing that you didn't expect to happen is the thing that happens. So leading up to giving birth, we'd done an amazing antenatal class. I'd read books, I'd listened to podcasts, and I got as prepared as I could be. And I thought however the birth went, I would be able to expect it. That wasn't the case. Now, I actually put that down very much to God's grace because naivety really is bliss in many situations. But I was a few days overdue and after waiting and waiting on Tuesday at 04:00 a.m. my waters broke. Now, some people might think, oh, gosh, did you panic? No, I was elated because I've been waiting so long, it felt if anyone has been pregnant, you know, by the end of pregnancy, you are done. You are just over it completely. So I was very excited. I decided not to wake to Endy because it was 04:00 a.m. and if my contractions got really heavy, then I would obviously let him know. I'd wait until his alarm went off for work and then tell him, well, far from my contractions getting really heavy, I hadn't even had one, two and a half hours later when his alarm went off. Now, I'm not sure if you've ever been woken by anyone who's running on an extremely high amount of adrenaline and has been awake for a long time, but poor Tendi had a mega full on wake up. Good morning.
[00:02:04] Guess what? As he's very groggily trying to find his alarm to turn it off, little did we know, three days later I would still be in labour and we would not have our baby.
[00:02:17] And so there I was, early hours of Friday morning. I've now been in labour for three days and active labor for 7 hours. And yet all can fill my mind amid more pain than I ever thought humanly. Possible.
[00:02:31] It's the thousands of women that have gone before me and those still in the position of giving birth without any form of medical help. In that moment, although my life was in no imminent danger, I have never been so aware of my mortality that my life will end. And whilst childbirth still claims far too many lives, thankfully, I was in absolutely no form of risk. But there was something about that process that, for me, made me very aware of the fragility of life, that death will come for myself. I don't know when or what the circumstances will be, but it will end.
[00:03:11] As the saying goes, only two things in life are death and taxes. I just saw somebody saying it. We all know it. But I actually think a third thing should be added to that, and that's the eternity of God. For in that moment, although the fragility of life has never seemed so real and so tangible, so the power and sovereignty of God has also never seemed so strong.
[00:03:38] While the sudden realization that our time, whether it be yourself or a loved one, is finite, far more present is the awareness that God never ends. We will end our time on earth, all of us, but he never ends. He is alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. He never sleeps or slumbers. He never gets sick. He never needs a holiday. He never becomes stressed. He never becomes fatigued. He is never not present or able. God is eternal.
[00:04:11] And so the reminder that God is all powerful and all knowing and able to be in all places comes hitting home once again.
[00:04:22] In the first few days of Benaiah's life, I was awash with a range of emotions. But the desire to protect, comfort and provide for this little bundle was also a roar from deep within me. And yet again, I knew I won't always be with him. He'll have to fight battles without me by his side, deal with challenges, and, God willing, live a long and healthy life long after I have gone. Only God is our eternal support, the lover of our soul and our joy.
[00:04:55] We often get lulled into thinking that in life, we have all the time in the world, and yet, really, we don't know what our time span is. I have a prayer that God will let me live to a certain age, but it's for him to decide. And really, it doesn't matter, because either way, I win. Either I'm on earth or I'm more alive than I have ever been in heaven.
[00:05:18] For heaven is as followers of Christ, the final destination, a place more beautiful than we could possibly imagine, more full of life and color than we have ever seen in revelations 21 four, it says, he will wipe away every tear from their eye, and death shall be no more. Neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore.
[00:05:46] Heaven is not just as follows of Christ, an inevitability that we have to accept, but something to relish as our final destination. I wonder how much we think about heaven, how much it's on our mind. We think about other endpoints a lot, don't we? Our bed or sofa at the end of a long day, our holiday at the end of a busy time, or retirement at a certain age. But what about heaven? How much do we think on heaven? Or have we lost sight of it completely?
[00:06:18] There's a passage in acts that recalls the final events of Stephen's life. He was preaching the gospel and seeing many incredible signs and wonders. And as a result, many people in the synagogues didn't like it. They tried to argue against him, but they couldn't refute his arguments. And so some people in a certain synagogue made up allegations against him. So he was brought in by the council.
[00:06:42] What he said so enraged the people that heard him that he was cast out of the city and stoned. We read in acts seven, but he, full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. And he said, behold, I see the heavens opened, and the son of man standing at the right hand of God. And as they were stoning Stephen, he called out, Lord Jesus, receive my spirit. And falling to his knees, he cried out with a loud voice, Lord, do not hold this sin against them. And when he had said this, he fell asleep.
[00:07:26] Being stoned to death is a painful way to die. But Stephen was so fixed on heaven. It says he gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God. If you have the glory of God in your eyes, I don't believe there's anything that could take you off that. There's nothing that could take you away from that. And the early church had heaven firmly on their mind. They believed Jesus was coming back at any moment. One, Thessalonians five says, for you yourself are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. It impacted how they thought, how they lived, what they planned. Not that you're planning your demise, they weren't planning their demise, but they were so aware that Jesus could come in any moment. All of it was done. Keeping heaven in mind.
[00:08:17] I wonder how it would change our day to day if we kept heaven in mind, how it would influence our everyday, would difficulties have a different perspective? With heaven in mind, would those stresses and pressures not seem quite so bad? If we had heaven in mind, would other people's opinions really matter if we kept heaven in mind? The situations will always be what they were, but the perspective is likely to be very different.
[00:08:51] I mentioned earlier that I'm a teacher and my subject is religious education.
[00:08:57] There's a topic in the GCSE that we do that looks at near death experiences. Near death experiences is when somebody medically dies, has an experience typically around the afterlife of some kind, and then comes back to life, often in a situation that is medically illogical.
[00:09:14] There's a lady that we look at who's a doctor. She's an orthopedic surgeon in America called Doctor Mary Neal. Now, this lady is a very keen kayaker, and a number of years ago, her and her husband were going kayaking in Chile. It's something that they'd been waiting for for a long time. They'd saved up, and they were going to travel a particular part of a river in Chile.
[00:09:38] They were into a number of days having kayaks each day, having a wonderful time. It was a holiday of a lifetime. And she was going over a particular rapid when the way that she fell, the rapid pinned her kayak to the bottom of the riverbed, she was completely stuck. She couldn't move her arms, she couldn't move her legs. She couldn't even move her back. She was completely bent over her kayak and pinned down by the water. She's an experienced kayaker, so it wasn't like she wasn't aware of the dangers or the situation, but she couldn't do anything. She said she tried to reach round and release her skirt, but there was nothing. There was nothing that she could do to release herself from being pinned on the bottom of the riverbed. And she realized very quickly that to die.
[00:10:27] Now, this was a lady who wasn't an active christian, but she said she prayed very earnestly that God's will would be done. And then she prayed the Lord's prayer. She said she was aware of her knees being snapped the wrong way as the river pulled her deeper and deeper onto the base of the riverbed. But far from feeling excruciating pain, oxygen, hunger, she said as soon as she prayed that God's will would be done, she felt an intense sense of calm. She was aware of the situation, but she was in no pain. She then recalls of meeting heavenly beings and having a sense of coming home and being more aware of being alive and at peace. Than she'd ever been.
[00:11:13] What? She was having that experience. The rest of her party was desperately trying to reach her. She'd now been under the water for twelve minutes and they just couldn't get to her.
[00:11:24] Back to Doctor Mary Neal. She then realizes that it is not her time and she has to go back. And she's then able to recall events of her rescue that she shouldn't be able to know because she was the one being rescued. And yet she can recall it. She went without oxygen for a total of 24 minutes, and yet she made a full recovery. And she went on to write books, give podcasts, give interviews on tv, etcetera. This was a lady that, before her accident, would have said that she knew God, but she didn't believe she needed God. So what changed?
[00:12:02] What resulted in somebody who'd never been in the public eye before to speak? Not just speak about herself, but to speak about heaven. Why is an experience of heaven so life changing?
[00:12:20] Because heaven is filled with God's presence and glory, and that is life changing. And where God's presence and glory is so that place will be more glorious than we could ever imagine and more beautiful than anything we have ever seen. In revelations four two, it says at once, I was in the spirit. And there before me was a throne in heaven with someone sitting on it. And the one who sat there had the appearance of Jasper and Ruby, a rainbow that shone like an emerald and circled the throne. Surrounding the throne were 24 other thrones, and seated on them were 24 elders. They were dressed in white and had crowns of gold on their heads. From the thrones came flashes of lightning, rumbles and peals of thunder. In front of the throne, seven lamps were blazing. These are the seven spirits of God. Also in front of the throne, there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal.
[00:13:25] Why is it so beautiful? Because that is where God the Father is. Of course. The Holy Spirit is active in living on earth for all who are born again. But heaven is where Jesus and the Father are. Isaiah 66 says, heaven is my throne. And when you're fixed on the presence and person of God, there is nothing else to do than worship him alone. The presence of God is beyond anything I could describe with my words. It's beyond what any artist could paint, what any filmmaker could, could try and show. It is all encompassing and it is so powerful that everything on earth fades away. For in him, every sickness is made well. Every tear wiped away, every pang of hunger filled, every thirst quenched. And death, o death, where is your sting? For Jesus is our resurrected king. And with that in mind, when psalm 121 says, the Lord who made heaven and earth, it holds such meaning. When we gaze upon the Lord, we are in awe and wonder of his might.
[00:14:30] That passage in revelations goes on to say, all around the throne, on each side of the throne, are four living creatures, full of eyes in front and behind. The first living creature was like a lion, the second like an ox. The third living creature with the face of a man. The fourth was like a flying eagle. Each of the four living creatures, each of them with six wings, are full of eyes all around and all within and day and night. They never stop saying, holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come.
[00:15:08] The creatures don't worship God because they are obliged to. It's not like the king in our country, where people bow to him because they're briefed on the right protocol or because they're attending to him because it's their job. In heaven, they worship out of revelation. Chris Burns says, heaven doesn't worship because they have to, but because it's the natural response to the beauty of God.
[00:15:31] That is why the closest creatures to the throne of God are covered in eyes. The better the view of the king, the greater the worship. The four living creatures never stop singing because they never stop seeing. And that is why we need to not lose sight of heaven, because it fixes our eyes on the king, on king Jesus.
[00:15:54] But we don't intend to lose sight of heaven, do we? I'm sure most of us didn't walk in this morning feeling really happy that we weren't as focused on God as we were meant to be or feel that we should be. Busyness, daily routines, difficulties in life, all of these things can cause us to lose sight. One moment we're fixing our eyes on him, and the next we're having thoughts or speaking things that are very far from Christ. Paul says, I do that which I don't want to do, and I don't do that which I do want to do. In romans seven, and often we can find ourselves in those situations. There's also those situations where we respond in ways that we didn't expect to be.
[00:16:35] How we were in that situation.
[00:16:38] A number of years ago, I was driving in very, very heavy traffic. We were crawling up to a set of multiple traffic lights, and for a split second I glanced at my phone because I saw a text message come in and I just wanted to see who it was from. And as I looked up the lorry that I was following, was there, right in front of me. Bam. I went straight into the back of this lorry at no more than 4 miles an hour. Now this was a massive juggernaut lorry. He didn't even shake it, didn't know that I had hit him. I hadn't even left a scratch on his rear bar. Meanwhile, I was driving my little fiat 500.
[00:17:17] I had wrapped myself around this rear bar and absolutely crumpled it. I'd never been in a car accident before. I didn't really know what you're meant to do. So I did something that was incredibly uncharacteristic of myself. Aware that I hadn't damaged the lorry, that I couldn't get the lorry driver's attention, I reversed back and pretended that nothing had happened.
[00:17:41] I sat in this ever long traffic jam as cars behind me that had seen what I'd done went past and were going.
[00:17:49] And I just smiled, looking straight ahead. Don't know what you're talking about.
[00:17:57] In life, situations happen that we often don't expect. Sometimes they catch us off guard. They can cause our focus to be taken off God. Jesus said, in life, worries will come, but fear not. I am with you in John 18. It's not that we've taken our eyes off heaven, off our king, but rather that we constantly come back to him, come back to that place of rest, come back to his presence, come back to bringing it all to his feet, because that is where things change. In God's presence, we are filled with thankfulness. That can be an amazing antidote to worry. In his presence, God comforts us for those things which are often difficult. Whether it be pain or difficulties or any type of need. In his presence, healings take place and miracles happen. The verse in revelations that talks about every tear being wiped away, that's not God being nice. That's not him saying, oh, I probably should do this because I'm a good God. That's the reality of being in his presence. In his presence, sickness cannot stand. Sadness cannot stand. Loneliness cannot stand, because his glory is so powerful and so awesome that those things are. Are simply evaporated.
[00:19:17] Heaven is more beautiful than we could ever describe because God is more beautiful than we could ever describe. Not losing sight of heaven is to continually come back to God's presence. However you best connect with God, it might be as you travel, it might be in the shower. In nature, there are many places where you can turn your sights back to him that aren't necessarily that traditional prayer time. As positive and as good as that is and if you feel like you've lost sight of heaven, you've not been in God's presence as much as you'd like to be, then find something in your now that can be that regular reminder to set your sights on him. Having a new baby. My normal rhythm and routine has totally been changed. Waking up early to spend time with God just isn't realistic or practical anymore. And it's easy when you have that shift to feel really guilty. But each time I did come to God, I felt him reminding me that he's not angry and he just loves to spend time with his beloved. And as much as that's me, that's also you. So pretty much every day I either drive somewhere or I'll go for a walk. So they're my times. That will be my time when I'll look up to heaven and bring it all to Jesus. Maybe you get the bus to work. Could that be your moment where you get your eyes back on Jesus? Do you take a walk during a lunch break? Have a shower when you get home? The journey home from dropping the kids to school, whatever it may be, God relishes time with his beloved.
[00:20:53] Sometimes you don't even need to speak. You just be together. As much as I love talking to Tendi or one of my close friends, we don't spend every moment talking. Often there'll be a pause where we just enjoy each other's presence. Enjoy being together. Remember, God isn't worshipped because we have to. We don't spend time in his presence because we're obliged to, because it will make us a good christian, but because we gaze upon his wonder and can't help but overflow in worship for him.
[00:21:26] And maybe you're thinking, but how do I gaze on Jesus when I pray? If I don't actively say something or even say something in my mind, then my mind wanders. Me too. Yeah, many times when I've gone to spend time with God and ended up planning an outfit, the shopping list, or the dinner for that night. But when you notice it, just get your eyes back on Jesus. Don't spend time beating yourself up. Just get your eyes back on Jesus. Maybe reading the Bible could be helpful. I find psalms really helpful because so many of them talk of his awe and his wonder. It could be listening to a certain type of worship music that will help fix your mind on worshipping the king. Maybe you find journaling really helpful. And if you do, just give God a chance to respond as you're writing to him. Whatever is your way of connecting and coming to that place of God's presence, let that be the place where we can, like Stephen, gaze to heaven and see the glory of God.
[00:22:27] And so, as we begin to close, it's not about how we do it, but rather that we find our moment to see his glory, where we can join with all the elders and cry, holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come. We can set our sights on heaven once more and gaze at the wonder of God as we look to him and are moved to worship, not out of obligation, but out of revelation. We are filled with his sorry, with his glory and presence.
[00:23:07] This is the one who made every blade of grass, every star in the sky. He formed you in your mother's womb, knitted every part of you together.
[00:23:19] He knows all things. He loves you and he loves you with such an intensity that he gave part of himself, his son, so that he can have a personal relationship with you. He is victorious and he is enthroned in high. And as psalm eight says, when I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him and the son of man that you care for him. You've made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honour. O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name.
[00:24:07] All the earth.
[00:24:09] As the worship team come up, there might be a few people here thinking heaven sounds really great, but I don't know where I'm going to go when I die. Or maybe you feel fearful of death.
[00:24:23] For those that are fearful, let me quickly address that. God is really clear. In two, Peter, three, nine. It says, the Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise, as some count slow less, but is patient towards you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. God's will is for all people to be with him. He doesn't want anyone to be lost.
[00:24:52] The joy of when you're both on team and if you've repented and you've opened your life to him, he wants nothing more than for you to be with him. And so heaven is your destination. There need be no fear there.
[00:25:11] And so if you don't know Christ or if you've gone away from him, if you repent and ask God into your life, that is his greatest wish. It says in Peter, he doesn't want anyone to be lost. He wants you to be there with him in his glory, in his might, in his majesty.
